what's wrong with the church in america today?

why is the church "failing"?
in large part, it is surely due to the poor image of the church that's projected by christians and 'christians' today.
many see christians as hypocritical.
many see the church as an unnecessary hurdle to a personal relationship with God.
"If a kingdom is divided against itself, that kingdom cannot stand. And if a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand."

the church is becoming increasingly divided amongst itself.

but who is standing against whom?

on that, we needn't worry. 

we ought simply to do the will of God.

"Whoever does the will of God is my brother and sister and mother."
the issues stem from the unwillingness to look inside, to admit our sins, all of our sins.
in our hyperindividual relationships with God through Christ Jesus we are trending away from the need to look at our sins, individual and corporate, and to have others help us see those sins.
because, of course, we must identify our sins and bring those sins to God as we seek repentance.
imagine God's reaction if/when one goes to God asking for forgiveness, saying, 'God, forgive me for whatever bad things i've done.  i don't know what i did, but i'm sure i did something, so can i have a clean slate now?'

we are continuously and increasingly isolating ourselves. 
we spend more times on smartphones and tablets.
we spend more time with netflix.
we spend more money donating with a click of a button.

the ancient desert fathers of the church who lived as hermits and even monastics of today who live in communities don't do so in isolation.
they play a specific role as a member or members of the church, the body of Christ.

in challenging times, these days where challenges from all angles, angles that are political and financial and institutional (the church itself faces internal as well as external challenges) and spiritual, we first ought to look within ourselves before taking action.
we must look within the church. 
to understand and possibly to redefine what the church is.
to inventory our resources, our leadership.
to regroup and restrategize and revitalize and regrow.
we are the living body of christ.
we are living muscles. and they need to be exercised and trained.
"But no one can enter a strong man's house and plunder his property without first tying up the strong man; then indeed the house can be plundered."

we got to get strong.

we got to get tough and act tough in tough times.when the going gets tough, the tough get going.

people have been following Christ Jesus for 2,000 years.
people have been following God since long before that.
the church will not die today. or tomorrow. or the day after that.
but, it's no excuse for any of us to sit idly by and not live out the lives and the love we are called to live. 

how deep is that call within you?
how loud are those groans? 
is that call to love louder than the shouts of the world of greed, of selfishness and self-centrism, of hyperindividualism and isolation, of egoism, of violence and anger and rage and hate?

if we are members of the body of christ, we must live as individual members working together with other members to move the body of christ!
we must go to church, a community, a body of believers.
we must pray with a body of believers. let's hold hands while we do it and physically, tangibly, be one body.
we must move the body out of the church into the world.
we must show the world we are the living body of christ.
we must exhibit to others that love of Christ.
we must live in and live out the love of God.

the death of spirituality in america

today, the rev. billy graham entered eternal life with our father in heaven.

i believe this marks the death of spirituality in america.
spirituality has been dying in the past few decades, aging slowly, hanging onto life, clinging in the last few years.
today, though, spirituality expires. 
usonians have been placing our spirituality in the hands of others.  we expect someone else to take care of it for us.  if we tithe, the pastor can handle the church.  if we pledge, the priest will pray long enough, hard enough to keep the parish right with God.  if the priest says the right words, we'll all be forgiven. 
on a related note, it's funny that usonians tend not to believe in the sacramentality that scores sacred orders and we tend to place our spirituality not in an office or a person, but rather in a corporate entity like a denomination or a brand (like rev. billy graham).

without a face or voice like rev. graham's, what will usonians do?  how will usonians react?  how will we manage our own christian spiritualities? 
will we realize we must take charge of our own spiritualities, realizing the full impact and potential of the personal aspects of the christian faith?  or, will we find the next best thing - the next loudest voice on the radio, the next pretty face on the tv, the next cool pastor on social media - and see how long that rides out for me, never mind my communities, my family, my children, the generations of human beings to come? 

postulancy

i received a phone call from the bishop today

i have been offered and i accepted postulancy to the holy order of priesthood in the episcopal church

what a wonderful feeling!

to have my calling affirmed by the church.

i so pleased and so blessed.

and i am so excited to begin the process of formation.

it's such a joyous feeling, that feeling of belonging.

that feeling of knowing this is where i'm supposed to be.

and where i'm supposed to be going.

that feeling of knowing this is what i'm supposed to be doing.

it's almost ineffable, the feeling.

in some ways, it's hard to describe.

those who have found their calling in life may know what i'm describing.

::sigh::

what a feeling.

now i just have to figure out where to go to seminary....

peace,

jo

liturgy

the other day after officiating evening prayer, one of the persons attending told me she really enjoyed my officiating in particular and really feels the Holy Spirit present
i was humbled.
and a bit speechless.
it's such a joy for me to officiate.
perhaps liturgy is part of my calling in ministry.
i also very much enjoy singing in the choir.
i feel so at home in worship.

also, at the postulancy conference, i was asked to read the Gospel for morning prayer.
afterwards, a laywoman told me she loved my reading, and she'd listen to me read all day.
i was so pleased to hear this because i think reading and liturgy is part of my vocation.

part of what i need to develop is confidence in my gifts and talents, something pointed out to me at the postulancy conference.
i think it's time i recognize and really own my reading and liturgy gifts.

lots of love, 

jo

hangover

ugh

i feel hungover

yesterday i attended the postulancy conference for aspirants of our diocese seeking priesthood and diaconate

after a full day of full-on pouring out of my spirit, i feel hungover

i honestly feel like i was put drinking yesterday evening and had just one too many

my fellow aspirants carl's friend calls it a vulnerability hangover

it really takes a lot of energy to be so vulnerable, to open up so much

i might call it a spiritual hangover.  i think this feeling can be had after any times of really opening our selves spiritually

being so open and in tune with things and people really requires a lot of energy.

even last night when I returned home i turned into a sloth

(funny enough, as i'm writing this i remember carl telling me he'd turn into a jellyfish and i wasn't sure I knew what he meant.)

as we were leaving yesterday father pae told me i could take off today and now i know why he suggested it: i was on a vulnerability bender.

i'm hungover.